Blog - Page 4 of 24 - Cynthia Gellis

November 18, 2020November 13, 2020

Rough Writers 2020 Anthology

I have an exciting announcement for y’all today: we have just published the Rough Writers 2020 Anthology: A Field Day for Creativity. This is the third Rough Writers Anthology (they published a collection in 2017, before I joined the club) and I think we’re really starting to get the hang of it.

You may remember last year’s post about the 2019 Anthology. Well, as we all know, no good deed goes unpunished and I agreed to serve as Editor for this year’s anthology as well. At least this way, I was able to apply some of the lessons that I learned the hard way putting together the 2019 book.

The subtitle, A Field Day for Creativity, was proposed by one of our members as a response to the prompt and our club’s innovative way of applying Toastmaster’s curriculum to our creative writing pursuits.

Rough Writers 2020 Anthology writing prompt — This image was our writing prompt. Photo by Branislav Belko on Unsplash.

Intrigued?

Good. Here’s an excerpt from my story:

Mrs. Bistone’s perfectly rendered exterior was her armor. It was a barrier both invisible and impenetrable. People were so taken with the apparition in front of them that they didn’t even notice what she was getting them to do, or say, or agree to. Her directives tended to be delivered in the form of questions, those kinds of small requests that would be rude to decline. She wouldn’t say she was manipulative. She just understood that by exercising absolute control over how she presented herself, she could exercise the same control over that to which she presented herself.

Everyone who had met her would say that they knew her, that they were dear friends. They would describe her poise and immaculate appearance in detail, but no one could ever recall one personal thing about her – where she grew up, what her interests were beyond the banal hobbies of any woman of means, or even the date of her birthday. Moreover, no one ever seemed to notice, which was the way that Mrs. Bistone preferred it.

Aren’t you dying to know how that has anything to do with the photo?

Well guess what? I’m giving away several copies of the Rough Writers 2020 Anthology!

All you have to do is be a subscriber to this blog and leave a comment below by 5:00pm on Friday, November 20.

I only have a limited number of author copies, so depending on the response, I’ll come up with some random way to select winners.

If you don’t want to leave it up to chance, you can order your own copy on Amazon (and if you don’t want to use the hyperlink, just put “Rough Writers 2020 Anthology” in your Amazon search bar). There is even a Kindle version if you prefer.

Monday, November 23 at 7:00 pm is our official book launch on Zoom. If you would like to find out more about the diverse voices who contributed stories to this volume, please join us – just leave a comment below and I will send you the sign-in details.

November 9, 2020November 8, 2020

Kindness Today and Every Day

For this edition of Health and Wellness Monday, I thought we could consider kindness.

This Friday, November 13^th is World Kindness Day, a holiday established in 1998 by The World Kindness Movement, an international consortium of NGOs, for the purpose of encouraging people to create a kinder world. I’m not really clear on what they mean by that, but it seems to have something to do with supporting projects that align with the United Nations sustainable development goals.

Did you know that there is also a Random Acts of Kindness Foundation? I didn’t either. The organization’s mission is to, “Make Kindness the Norm.” They suggest that an individual can celebrate World Kindness Day by intentionally engaging in random acts of kindness such as buying someone a cup of coffee or giving someone a compliment. I tend to think of these things more as “random acts of niceness” but that’s alright. One of my favorite random acts of niceness is sending someone a card in the mail for no reason. I mean, isn’t it exciting to get mail from an actual person! But phone calls and texts are nice too.

I thought it would be interesting would be to examine the distinction between being ‘kind’ and being ‘nice,’ so I went to the dictionary. While ‘nice’ is defined as, “polite, kind, pleasing, agreeable, appropriate, fitting,” the word ‘kind’ is defined in the Merriam Webster Dictionary as, “of a sympathetic or helpful nature.”

I like to think about kindness as being a little bit more than just doing something nice for someone. For me, an act of kindness is a compassion exercise in which I separate a person from their beliefs and/or actions in my heart. I may disagree with someone or not like their behavior, but still have sympathy (and sometimes even empathy or compassion) for them as a person. By doing so, I am better able to interact with that person in a kind manner.

Remember that story, The Box that I published last month? I would say that kindness kind-of ties into the ideas expressed in that story. It is an act of kindness to not put someone in a box based on one facet of their personality but to acknowledge that people are complex creatures who may not necessarily be defined by one element of their beliefs and/or actions. It’s like that thing about not defining yourself by your feelings (ex: I am angry) but acknowledging that you are a person having a feeling (I feel angry) applied to someone else.

This doesn’t mean that an act of kindness requires you to be a pushover or condone someone’s behavior. It’s like Brené Brown says, “Strong back, soft front, wild heart.” Know who you are and what you believe. Then be willing to accept other people for who they are and what they believe.

Here’s the thing: there will still be people who you just don’t agree with. You might plain old just not like someone. But what if you chose to face them with kindness rather than confrontation? Maybe your strong back, soft front, wild heart will inspire the same in someone else. You could start a chain reaction of kindness.

World Kindness day is Friday, but why not start today? You could even throw in a random act of niceness or two while you’re at it.

November 6, 2020November 6, 2020

Flash Fiction Friday – Cat Mask

Ok guys, here’s another delight for you for Flash Fiction Friday. It’s been a tense week and I thought you might enjoy a little something to lighten the mood. Something about a cat mask maybe.

This time the exercise given to my writing group involved exploring using a point of view in storytelling.

Our instructions were: write a scene involving a central character and one or more strangers (people the character has never met before) using either the first-person, third-person limited, or third-person omniscient point of view. Try to pick a point of view that you don’t normally use. Also, try to limit the use of dialog, instead using descriptive language to show how people behave and interact.

I had forgotten what I wrote for this exercise and when I pulled it out, I laughed out loud. Hopefully, you will too.

Cat Mask

Ugh, what is that guy looking at? He is totally staring at me in a super creepy way. As if I can’t tell just because he is wearing a mask. As bizarre as it seems, wearing a mask these days is not creepy. But even with everyone’s face covered, you can still tell when someone is giving off a creepy vibe.

That’s one thing I mostly love about COVID times, the mask wearing. I feel very conspicuous, but in a completely anonymous way. I’ve taken to wearing the flashiest masks possible, confident in the knowledge that if anyone had to describe me later, they would say something along the lines of, “Oh, she was wearing a bejeweled Día de los Muertos mask,” and that would be it.

By the same token, this guy’s interest in me goes beyond delight at the fact that today’s embroidered kitty-cat mask sports very realistic-looking whiskers. And, yes, of course I accessorized my accessory with cat-eye sunglasses. And no, I am not planning on taking them off inside of the store, it is part of the look. Geez!

I planned my entire ensemble today as an expression of my inner cattiness. The cat-eye sunglasses and be-whiskered mask are just the icing on the cake. It is finally cool enough to wear a sweater and I have the perfect cardigan with a faux fur collar and cuffs that can be pulled down over my hands. Fuzzy slippers seemed like completely appropriate footwear for the occasion. The only problem I had when I was getting dressed was deciding on the right pants to wear. In the end, I wound up going with … um … well shoot, this is embarrassing.

I may have been so excited about my whisker mask that I might have gotten distracted and forgotten to put on pants before I left the house. Yikes! Well alright creepy guy, you win. I suppose a chubby, middle-aged lady prancing through the Trader Joes parking lot without any pants on would get my attention as well.

At least no one will know that it’s me!

P.S. If anyone knows where I can get a cat face mask with whiskers, let me know!

October 16, 2020October 16, 2020

Flash Fiction Friday – The Box

I’ve been having fun with the prompts that my writing group has been sending out. So much so that I’ve decided to create a new category for The In-Between Things: Flash Fiction Friday.

For this week’s post, here is the prompt we were given:

The prompt today is suggested from Harlan Ellison. Ellison liked to come up with the title of the story first. Your title prompt is, “THE BOX.” The box can become a source of fear, love, funny, or adventure. You decide what’s in the box and how it affects you!

I immediately knew what I wanted to write. I hope you like it!

The Box

I was chatting with someone when I heard it.

“The thing about you is …”

Oh, here we go again, someone wants to put me in a box. Even though it happens all the time, I still can’t help being surprised.

I used to try on every box. It seemed like the polite thing to do. I would really try to fit. I would climb in, poke around in all the corners, and contort myself in every possible way. I was much thinner and more flexible in those days, so it was easier to humor someone when they presented the box they had selected for me. But even then, I never could make myself fit.

I always hoped that when someone recognized that I didn’t fit in their box, they would want to discover why there was more to me than they had thought. That is why I always tried to be polite. I didn’t want anyone feel embarrassed about their misjudgment.

Some people were really adamant about wanting me to fit into their box. They would shove and stomp, like they were trying to close an over-full suitcase. No matter how hard they tried, I never fit. No one ever had the right box.

One day, when I was waiting patiently to get out, the people trying to put me in that box started talking as if I couldn’t hear them.

“All I’m saying is that if we just cut off the leg right about there, we could shove it in over here and voila! Then we could get this box all sealed up.”

“Yeah, but that is going to make a big mess, I don’t think this box is coated to retain liquids. Maybe we can just snap some joints so that they bend further.”

The most surprising thing about this exchange was how invested they were in getting me sealed up in their box. Most of the time, folks would just loose interest and wander away.

These days, I still try to be polite when someone wants to put me in a box. But I don’t try them on anymore.

October 1, 2020September 20, 2020

When Every Day is Coffee Day

What a caffeinated week this is! Between National Coffee Day on Tuesday and International Coffee Day today, I am certainly feeling the buzz.

Did I ever tell you about my very first job? I worked at a coffee place in the mall. We sold fancy espresso makers and all the flavored coffee beans (remember chocolate raspberry flavored coffee beans? My favorite!). But mostly we sold frou-frou coffee drinks, those cakes-by-the-slice with the big, chocolate leaves on top, and other snacky stuff that was sure to put a pep in your step.

I was so excited to get that job, but the blush was off the rose pretty quickly when it came to wearing that ruffled pinafore uniform. Nonetheless, I learned how to make a pretty good cappuccino, the joy of chocolate-covered espresso beans, and most importantly, that hungry people are mean and should be avoided.

The experience did nothing to dampen my love of coffee. Even when I was a starving college student, I couldn’t live without was my morning cup of coffee (brewed at home, thank you very much!). And even now, even when I’ll try all sorts of wacky health remedies (coconut oil pulling anyone?), I just have to smile and shake my head when someone suggests that I trade my morning coffee for hot tea.

Coffee Fun Facts

*just a few things that I found notable from a very extensive Wikipedia article about coffee, click here to read the whole thing.

Coffee originated in Ethiopia and is believed to have been brought to the world via trade with the Arabian Peninsula, in particular, a place in Yemen called Mocha in the sixteenth century. (Mocha – get it! Yum!)
Cultivation in the western hemisphere began in the Caribbean and South America in the early 1700s.
The two main varieties of coffee plants that are cultivated for commercial coffee production are C. arabica and C. canephora (aka robusta). Roughly 75% of coffee cultivated is arabica, which is considered milder. Robusta tends to be more bitter and contains as much as 50% more caffeine than arabica; it is the preferred bean for espresso.
Coffee plants seem to thrive in forest environments where they benefit from the protection of a diverse ecosystem. For example, one of the most damaging pests for coffee plants, the coffee borer beetle, is delicious to certain birds, so if the coffee plants are grown somewhere with trees nearby, the birds help mitigate the damage from the beetles. Isn’t nature smart!
Nordic countries are the highest per capita consumers of coffee. Maybe it has something to do with the cold, dark climate. I always remember a few years ago when Mr. Man went up to Seattle in February for work. It was cold and dark and generally not the kind of weather you appreciate when you live in southern California. He was telling me about how the sun barely came out at 8am and set by 3pm; the punchline of his story was, “There’s a reason that the coffee here is so good.”

Whether you are a daily coffee drinker, someone who goes for a frou-frou princess latte on special occasions only, or caffeine-free, I hope this post put a little pep in your step.

September 21, 2020September 17, 2020

Vote Smarter Not Harder

Even as someone who avoids the news, I am very aware that there is an election coming up in November. One race is a big topic on everyone’s mind, but that is not the only item on our ballots. So in today’s post, I would like to encourage you to vote smarter not harder – to take a little time to really look into who and what you are voting for on your entire ballot so that you can make an informed decision on each candidate and ballot initiative.

Researching my ballot is not my favorite way to spend my time and I don’t doubt there are lots of other things that you would rather be doing. But I assure you that it is time well spent. By putting that effort in, I can feel comfortable that I’m voting for the candidate who will potentially cause the least amount of harm or that I’m not supporting a ballot initiative that would cost more than its purported benefit. In the March primary election, one guy running for district court judge actually changed his first name to Judge. At first glance, I thought, “Oh, this guy is already a judge,” but no, he was actually not at all qualified and being intentionally misleading!

How to research your ballot

It can be tricky to find good sources of information about local and state races. I will sit down with my ballot and Google each item. You can search by district (ex: CA 47^th Congressional District), by candidate (they all pretty much have their own website these days – it’s a good way to get an idea of their education and professional background), or by region (ex: LA County Voter Guide). Your local bar association will put out a list rating candidates for judicial positions as “well qualified,” “qualified,” or “not qualified.” I’m a big fan of the voter guide put out by the Southern California Public Radio website LAist; I hope that other public radio stations put out similar information. I like to compare what a candidate’s website, LAist, and my local newspapers have to say about things.

The League of Women Voters (LWV) also puts out a voter guide. I love the LWV; it is a non-partisan organization that was founded in 1920 (the year the 19^th Amendment was ratified) to help women carry out their responsibilities as voters and today is an organization dedicated to encouraging the active and informed participation of all citizens. The LWV doesn’t take a position on initiatives, it simply presents them as written and explains potential impacts, who is supporting and opposing each one, and what a “yes” vote or a “no” vote would mean. They have a resource called Vote 411 where you can put in your address and get personalized voting information.

A new resource that I just found is Ballotpedia. The website states that its mission is to deliver, “unbiased information to educate and inspire American voters” and it seems to have a lot of straightforward information. I think that I will be incorporating this site into my ballot research.

If you haven’t already received your California voting guide in the mail, here is a link to an online version: California Voting Guide.

Who and what you decide to vote for is none of my business and I wouldn’t presume to offer you my opinions on any of the races or measures. But I do hope that you will consider committing a little bit of your time to looking up the candidates and propositions before you mail you ballot in early or head to the polls. Remember to vote smarter not harder.

September 14, 2020September 3, 2020

International Talk Like a Pirate Day

When I was thinking about posting about International Talk Like a Pirate Day, I consulted my sister – who is an expert in all things piratical – to ask where such a topic would fit in my posting schedule. She quickly and firmly responded: Health & Wellness Monday. So, today’s post will focus on the health and emotional benefits of talking like a pirate (at least for a day).

International Talk Like a Pirate Day (TLAP) is held annually on September 19. Established in 2002 by a couple of guys – Ol’ Chumbucket and Cap’n Slappy, they chose September 19 because it was Cap’n Slappy’s ex-wife’s birthday.

The idea for TLAP Day arose out of a handball injury. One of the guys tweaked something, and exclaimed, “Arrrrrr!” This became an inside joke which evolved into an internationally recognized holiday.

When I learned that delightful tidbit, it reminded me of many years ago when I would play tennis with a group of ladies after work. One of the gals had been a tennis instructor and she was working with me on my hitting. She kept coaching me to say, “grrrr!” when I hit the ball, but it wasn’t until I switched to “argh!” that my stroke improved. In that moment Pirate Tennis was born. One of the other gals even made us a little logo – a skull (with lovely eyelashes) and crossed tennis rackets (I wish I still had a copy of it to show you!).

How does one celebrate TLAP Day? However you see fit! You don’t need to partake in excessive amounts of grog or have an elaborate pirate costume; but if any of that is your jam, go for it. Ol’ Chumbucket and Cap’n Slappy are very clear that this is TALK like a pirate day, not ACT like a pirate day. They don’t condone acts of piracy. What it is all about is expressing your pirattitude.

Pirattitude is defined by the Urban Dictionary as the natural attitude that comes from embracing one’s inner pirate. I feel that it has to do with expressing oneself in a bold manner, not worrying about holding back or staying quiet to try to be polite.

So here we can get into the wellness benefits of talking like a pirate – sometimes you just have to let it out! Don’t be afraid to “Arrrr!” or “Argh!” or however else you feel like you need to exclaim. I mean, I do whisper sweet nothings to the kittens all day long, but some days speaking clearly and articulately is a challenge. The other week, I was going to give a speech at my Toastmasters meeting (online), and it took me four times reading my speech out loud to find my voice. It can feel strange to speak up when you are at home alone. But try it. Not in that soft, sing-song way that you talk to yourself, in a bold, loud, clear way.

Whether or not you decide to celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day on Saturday, I hope you will take an opportunity to express your pirattitude (even if it is just to your cats).

September 9, 2020September 2, 2020

Introducing the Virtual Museum Visit Series

the louvre museum, photo by Chris Karidis on Unsplash

Do you miss museums? What do you think about a virtual museum visit?

Back in the old days (before March 2020) I liked to find a reason for a museum visit at least a couple of times a year. For me, it was a great way to break out of my routine and get a different perspective on things. If there wasn’t an exhibit that I was particularly interested in, the people watching alone was usually well worth the price of admission.

Some museums are beginning to open with restrictions. When I think about recent museum visits, a social-distanced museum experience sounds delightful. But I’m probably not going to make a point of going to a museum anytime soon.

Venus de Milo at the Louvre: Photo by Jean Carlo Emer on Unsplash

Recently, I saw a teaser on the internet about virtual museum tours and thought what a great topic for a blog post! Most of us still aren’t traveling anyway, why not check out some of the great museums of the world from home?

I thought that it would be easy to pull together a list of museums and link to their virtual tours and we would be on our way.

Once I started digging in, the first thing that became clear is that not all virtual museum tours are created equal. The second thing was that trying to wander around a museum virtually is not as easy or as much fun as one would hope.

Like most things on the internet, it is better to have an idea about what you are looking for before you begin. Whereas back in the old days, you could decide to go to a museum and just wander around for a few hours, the navigation of even the most user-friendly virtual museum tour is broken down into layers and layers of sub-menus. There are so many decisions to make before you get near any art.

Some virtual museum tours try to make it seem like you are walking through the galleries. I found these tricky to navigate and started to get frustrated. Some are more like online photo albums – it’s really more of a slide show than a virtual tour.

I realized that what I really wanted was some sort of video where someone would take me through a gallery, give me a good look at the work, and tell me about it. I started to find some videos on YouTube, but there is a lot of variation with these as well. So, what I’ve decided to do is start a series here where I will create a curated virtual museum visit for various places. These may include videos, virtual tours, selections from a collection, and articles about the institution, a particular collection, exhibit, or work.

This will give me an excuse to snoop around and see what I can find with a clear goal in mind: providing you, with a manageable, curated experience. I envision it being the kind of thing that you can just read the post and go on with your life or you can take a little time to click through the various resources I’ll link to and have your own little virtual field trip.

St Peter’s Basilica: Photo by Jan Tielens on Unsplash

Some of the places that I have started exploring for us include:

On the one hand, it’s never going to be the same as being there in person. On the other hand, doesn’t it sound fun is it to get to poke around from the comfort of your own home?

I’m going to try to post at least one a month and we’ll see how it goes. If you have any tips for navigating virtual museum experiences or suggestions for particular things that you would like to see, let me know!

September 3, 2020August 23, 2020

Celebrating World Coconut Day

Yes, yes I did happen to go through one of those made-up holiday calendars and make note of the ones I found interesting. And no, they are not ALL Cat Days (although there seems to be at least one cat day pretty much every month). But perusing things that someone somewhere thinks merit holidays does give one opportunities to contemplate delightful topics such as World Coconut Day.

World Coconut Day is September 2, but like all of these made-up holidays, it seems like the kind of thing you could celebrate any old time. There is also a National Coconut Day on June 26; you could book-end your summer with coconut celebrations if you wanted to.

As a fan of the coconut, I decided that I would take advantage of today being World Coconut Day adjacent to learn some coconut fun-facts:

Coconut is the fruit of the coconut palm. It is used for water, milk, oil, and meat (coconut kernel). Coconut milk, cream, and oil are all extracted from the kernel which is mostly fat.

The fat found in coconuts is a medium triglyceride (MCT) which is considered a type of good fat. MCTs are considered a good source of energy because they can be absorbed directly by the small intestine. Coconuts also contains phenolic compounds, which are antioxidants (substances that help maintain the health of our cells).

Coconut shell can be used to make an iconic bikini top substitute, drinking vessels, and other crafty things. It can also be processed into charcoal. The fibrous husk can be processed into coir, which can then be used to make things like doormats.

photo courtesy of wikimedia commons

Did you know there is such a thing as coconut flour? I didn’t. But I learned that it is made from dried coconut kernel and is gluten free. And if you’re in the market for gluten free flour, you might be interested to know that coconut flour has less carbs and less fat than almond flour.

All of these coconut fun-facts got me thinking about my favorite coconut applications:

One of my favorite coconut products from my youth was classic Hawaiian Tropic tanning oil (which turns out was mostly mineral oil). It smelled divine and helped me achieve that tropical, golden glow.

In my early grown-up years, I parlayed my love of Hawaiian Tropic into an affinity for Malibu Rum. These days, rum is not my go-to spirit, but I sure do like Pina Coladas (and getting caught in the rain). I also love a Blue Hawaiian (when I can get my expert Tiki drink-maker neighbor to make one for me – hint, hint).

Of course, coconut cream pie is another of those coconut treasures that I can’t get enough of (even though it’s been two years since I made one – what am I thinking!?).

In our ongoing homemade ice cream venture, we are still working on perfecting coconut ice cream. Mr. Man’s special touch is adding toasted, salted coconut flakes to the coconut milk/coconut cream base (yum!). The problem is we are having a hard time getting a consistently creamy texture. My sister recently sent us an article about adding spirits to your homemade ice cream to help it stay softer. I may need to get myself some Malibu Rum!

How about you? What are your favorite coconut applications? How would you celebrate World Coconut Day?

August 26, 2020August 7, 2020

National Book Lovers Day

August ninth marked the observance of National Book Lovers Day, a day that encourages people to put down their devices (unless that device is an e-reader I suppose) and read a book!

I am currently reading around three and a half books:

Women Who Run with Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes (a reread – but this time I’m taking notes)
Pilgrimage to Dollywood by Helen Morales
Women & Power, a Manifesto by Mary Beard
The Dharma Bums by Jack Keroac (this is another re-read and I’m not feeling that into it, I may put it back on the shelf)

Some books I have read recently that I really enjoyed:

Dreyer’s English, An Utterly Correct Guide to Clarity and Style by Benjamin Dreyer (yes, it is a grammar/English usage book and yes, I laughed out loud many times while reading it)
Range, Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World by David Epstein (I felt my entire existence was vindicated)
Circe by Madeline Miller (spoiler – I didn’t love how it ended)
Antigone Rising by Helen Morales (if you have two X chromosomes, this might get you riled up)
How to Change Your Mind by Michael Pollan
Animal Dreams by Barbara Kingsolver (see, sometimes I read fiction; a suggestion from a friend)
City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert (see, more fiction; another suggestion from another friend)

As much as I love books and I love to read, I don’t love to keep ALL the books in my house. I was really into Larry McMurtry for a while; I had pretty much every book that he had written through 1998 or so and in the course of one move I got rid of all of them. I’ve only read one new Larry McMurtry book since then, but I loved it so much I’m almost feeling like I need to get my paws on a new copy of Lonesome Dove or Terms of Endearment. But I’m also trying to make a point of reading women authors, so revisiting Larry McMurtry may have to wait a little longer.

Much like all the cat holidays, I feel like National Book Lovers Day can be celebrated year-round. Here are some ways to celebrate National Book Lovers Day any day of the year:

Read a book!
Pass a book along to a friend.
Return a book that you borrowed from a friend.
Buy a book from your local, independent bookstore. Or any independent bookstore (they all ship). Page Against the Machine is my favorite independent bookstore here in Long Beach (I might know the owner). Chris carries an excellently curated selection of new and used books in the political and social justice genres. However, he also is very happy to custom order any title that you are looking for.
Order a custom bookstack watercolor for yourself or a friend. Trying to think of what books I would want for my bookstack gives me anxiety, but if you know what you would pick, check out the Etsy shop of my friend Kiersten: ShortstackByKiersten.

How cute are these handpainted book stacks?
What books would you put in your shortstack?
Images by @kiershort_art

Did you or are you going to celebrate National Book Lovers Day? What are you reading now? Any suggestions of books to check out?